Darkest Temptations

Hello again, my lovely twisted sistahs. In keeping with my emphasis this week on the more evil and horror-filled side of the genre we so love, I’ve tapped an author who recently just joined our jaunt to the wayward, and who simply…

BLEW my fuckin’ MIND

…with her first dance onto the darkside. Oh, and when I say dance, I’m not talking a simple sway of the hips, or pirouette by her pretty little feet, but a downright bump and GRIND onto the other side.

For those of you who haven’t read it yet, I’m talking about our very own...

HammerHips

But not only has she delved into the deliciously dark, I get to pop her juicy interview cherry! WooooMeeee. ;D (Trust me, she’s singing woowoowoo right now after what I…, er nevermind.)

If you haven’t read her Underneath Your Scars, I MOST HIGHLY recommend you put your piggies in the water and simply test out the first two chapters. I guarantee a shock and awe kinda a moment. But she has recently written two new fics: one called “Decay” and the other “A Normal Halloween” co-written with JamesRamsey - two fics very UNLIKE what she’s ever written before.

So I sent out some emails and feelers (my fingertips are quite talented), to some of her most passionate reviewers, and ask them to identify their favorite dark scene in any of her fics, and just why it spoke to them. SushiLovesWhitlock (aka @sushibrat) and givemesomevamp loved my touch so much, and the quivering pools of goo it turned them into, they quickly agreed. I then sent the scenes they chose to HammerHips and asked her the centuries-old question:

Where in the name of sparkly peen
did you come up with this scene?

Givemesomevamp picked a scene from Chapter 2 - Underneath Your Scars

Splinters of wood and chunks of plaster were strewn about in a violent pattern, and the light from above flickered across millions of shards of glass. Photos were shredded like confetti, dancing amongst the rubble. Scraps of upholstery and chunks of wood were scattered over the counters, hanging haphazardly out of the sink, and sprinkled between the kitchen and living room. All of this registered in the back of my mind, but I was focused on the red. Red drops, swirls, and streams stenciled in the detritus. Blood. Two spidery creeks of blood contrasted against the white linoleum. Thickened rivers turned the carpet into a macabre sponge.

I choked back a scream as a gurgled moan manifested from a darkened corner of the living room. Stumbling through the mess and debris, I gasped as I crumpled next to the bloody mass. The man's body from the waist down was crushed and twisted into meaningless lumps of flesh, sticky with sweat and blood. One hand had been wrenched savagely from his body, and there were half a dozen crescent shaped marks scattered over his torso. A shard of wood had lanced his side, perforating a lung. His face was battered and bloody but his dark eyes looked exactly as I remembered. I focused on his eyes just as a spark of realization shone through his orbs.

“This bit is my favorite because it's the first time my heart clenched and tears were shed while reading one of her fics; this is when she earned her place as one of my favorites. I mean, DAYUM. Who can read that and not feel SOMETHING?

My measure of an author is often more than just their ability to string together pretty words that I'm actually capable of comprehending. I like to have some kind-of reaction, any reaction, really, to what I'm reading. Since I like to visualize as I read, I also tend to like strong imagery and HammerHips provides this in spades. She always good for a giggle and a few snorts in her stories but it's the bone-chilling bits of gruesome that showcase her talent brilliantly.”

HammerHips’ response:

Wow, this was one scene I didn’t expect to be chosen. Everything I write has one goal: to get a strong emotional response out of the reader. A ton of my reviewers comment that my stories are “roller coaster rides of emotion”, and that’s probably why. I want to make you laugh because it makes it that much more painful when you have to cry. But then, when something makes you laugh again, you feel that wonderful release of those negative emotions.

When I sat down to write this scene, my goal wasn’t just to paint a gruesome picture because anyone can do that. I wanted the reader to feel what Bella was feeling at the time. She was coming across the bodies of the two people she cared about the most in her human life, and that had to be pretty fucking traumatic. I tried to make it seem like time had slowed down for her. I wanted her to register the chaos around her piece by piece because it symbolized the destruction of her human life.

The description of the body, well, let’s just say that we hear that vamps have this super-human strength, and in the books it’s so damn hard for Edward not to put his hand through her skull. If this were true, when a vamp got truly angry at a human—or a shapeshifter—then what was left wouldn’t be pretty, would it? Irina was running off of revenge and pure anger, and I wanted that to be obvious from the state of the body. At the same time, I wanted her to have one last moment with her best friend, so I left his eyes intact. Too bad the other corpse wasn't so lucky.

SushiLovesWhitlock picked a scene from Chapter 1 - Decay

"The worms crawl in, the worms crawl out…"

Shut up, Jan.

Jan was the talker of the group, and I couldn't wait until the beetles ate her big, fat lips so I wouldn't have to listen to her snarky comments any longer. At least the bugs were good for something.

"Did I strike a nerve?"

"Let her be, Jan. She's having a tough time right now."

"Who asked you, Greg? I'm bored," she pouted. "I just want to have a little fun."

How about you all shut the fuck up!

“What caught my attention was the fact that the Brady Bunch were in there. I mean, I fucking love the fucking Brady Bunch. (Funny or sad, depending on how you see it, I HAD a Brady Bunch CD once and then it got stolen and that was a sad day. But I'm digressing) So what made gave this story that special HammerHips touch was the fact that it was gruesome with the images of putrified bodies, odors, gnats and other critters BUT she added the fucking Brady Bunch in the mix. I mean seriously, I was so glad I wasn't eating when I read that, especially noodles or something.

What HammerHips did was made it go from the regular macabre to like this demented macabre thing. She may not be Tim Burton but it felt like she was channeling him or what he would be like after he saw clowns fucking or something (sorry EC, I know you don't like em so here is the brain bleach). It was gross but it also cracked my ass up and THAT was like the demented piece.”

HammerHips’ response:

Demented? Yes. Ha! Yep, this is actually a funny story! (EC editorial: It so is, but it’s soooo not.) When I started writing Decay, it was just an exercise in stream of consciousness, trying to get something down on paper without even having an outline—except for the one that was in my head. I hadn’t picked out names at all, and as I wrote, I just used the first names that popped into my head.

I literally shut my brain down and just wrote, not thinking about anything. The only thing I knew was that I wanted Bella to have a psychotic break and create a “family” with the corpses. When I was writing, I just came up with the first names that popped into my head. Then, I realized I’d named part of the Brady Bunch. I had an “Oh Fuck!” moment, ended up getting online with givemesomevamp to discuss it with her. I wasn’t sure if it was too over the top to have Bella’s corpse family named after the Brady Bunch, but she laughed her ass off at me, so I went with it. I’m still not sure if she was laughing at the fact that it was the Brady Bunch, or if she was laughing at me because I had absentmindedly used the Brady Bunch.

As far as what I was trying to convey here, it was one of those moments where I wanted to throw my readers for a loop. I mean, Bella’s having a pretty shittastic time. She’s had a psychotic break, and conjured up the perfect family for herself - only they aren’t perfect. But, even the perfect family has one douche in it that says all the wrong things and likes to stir the shit pot a bit, right? Yep, that’s Jan.

*points to the above* Let’s face it folks, some of these twisted minds are like some Indiana Jones-esque archeological dig. Snakes, scorpions, and who know what else you’ll find squirming around in there. Frankly I’m of the opinion that HammerHips’ mind is like one of THE scariest places on earth. Buuuuuut, I couldn’t let her get away too quick though, without asking her a few other questions.

Where do you get the ideas for your fic? Out of the blue? Family members? Nightmares? Alcohol? ;D

Well, Christ on a cracker, you had to ask this didn’t you? Hrmm, I don’t know which fics you’re referring to, and I have an assload of them, so I’ll go through them one by one.

UYS came to me after reading Eclipse, even before I knew there was such a thing as fanfiction. It was my daydream because I LOVED Jasper. Then, when I was complaining to a friend about Twilight, she told me about fanfiction. I read Colliding Meteors by Idreamofeddy, and I was completely blown the fuck away. I started reading The Orbiting Meteor next, then, I read Insecurities by JamesRamsey and I was in it for the long haul. There were lots of other Jasper/Bella or Peter/Bella fics I started reading (JaspersIzzy’s being one of them), and the more I read, the more I thought that I could write this stuff, too. I looked at Insecurities again, and decided it was time to write my own. I’m glad I did, because I found my best friend and beta in the process: givemesomevamp. (BBBF gratuitous pimpage now commencing: Go read givemesomevamp’s new story, “Slow Burn”. It’s dark, and it’s gonna be more awesome than three midgets dry humping four midgets!)

Butterfly Effect came from all the real life shit I’ve been through lately, and it’s full of angst and is more serious than UYS, mainly because UYS was my escape and BE was my way of facing my problems head on. It sounds cliché, but it’s true. There are a lot of people who have given me flack over this one, just because it’s not full of the funneh, but *shrugs*, it’s still one of my favorites so far.

Whiskey & Spitfire came about because I had writer’s block with Butterfly Effect. I just started writing stream of consciousness—it was my way of taking away the angst—and I had the first draft of chapter one written in an hour. After that, I tweaked it a bit and sent it to givemesomevamp for her opinion and she told me I HAD to post it. So I did. And you wouldn’t believe all the stuff I’ve cut out of that one. *laughs* Seriously, I’m pretty sure if I would have sent out my first drafts, I would have offended every religion, race, creed, etc. in the first two chapters. Yep, apparently you CAN go too far.

A Normal Halloween, which was a collab between me and one of my favorite fanfiction authors, JamesRamsey, started quite innocently. There were people on Twitter that had just finished reading UYS, and they were commenting on how they would love to see something written as a collab between the two of us because they loved our Jaspers. So JR and I collectively shrugged our shoulders and gave it a try—the contest being anonymous just added to the appeal, since people wouldn’t know it was us until it was all over. We started out with a name for our own reasons *snicker*, Abby Normal, and we came up with the outline from there. Seriously, JamesRamsey seems normal, but one of the things I love about her the most is her brain. I like to pick it, and damn, she’s just as twisted as I am, which was AWESOME!

Decay was the most unusual of all. I was cleaning one of my guns while watching Monty Python and the Holy Grail; I was watching the scene where the dude is arguing that he’s not dead, and a damn gnat was buzzing me. It wouldn’t leave me alone and it got me to thinking. The first thing I came up with in the story was the gun being jammed with gnats, so the working title was Gnats to begin with. I thought about how disgusting the smell of decaying flesh was, and I sat down and started writing—no outline at all. I never planned on sharing it, but since there was a Halloween contest going on, I decided to go for it. I would NEVER have shared it otherwise, because it truly shows that my brain is more twisted than Rapey the Clown. (EC editorializing: For you readers who don’t know who Rapey is, either see my segment within our Halloween feature, or don’t ask. No really.)

So, now that I’ve rambled on for forever, I guess most of the ideas from my fics come from out of the blue. LOL. Just one simple idea and I build upon it. Oh, and there’s usually lots of mind-fornication with givemesomevamp. We like to pick each other’s brains, and that my friends, is a match made in sparkly-peen Heaven.

You have a few fics that are Dark, and some that are hilarious. Which do you prefer writing? What do you love most about writing Dark? i.e. the ability to manipulate characters, going to the darkside in general, etc.

It really depends on my mood, to be honest. I enjoyed UYS and the outpouring of love it received, but I can’t go back and read it. I’ve tried and it makes me die a little inside. UGH! I love it because it helped me develop my own writing style, though. I can’t say that I prefer either. I like the humor and I like the serious. The only thing I don’t like about having the range that I do is when someone gives me a virtual junk punch by telling me how one fic is serious and I should only write the funneh. Sorry. I write what speaks to me, and although reviews are like an awesome clown car filled with midgets for me, I don’t write for them. I write for me, so if you don’t like it, flounce. But please don’t tell me what to do. All you’ll do is make me ornerier than a one eyed pocket gopher in a thistle patch.

I guess my style of dark is different than most, and that’s what I love about writing it. So, going back to your question about which I prefer writing, I suppose I like to incorporate both. I love the dark humor the best, although it isn’t for everyone. Throwing sick and twisted jokes in Decay, A Normal Halloween, and my Carlisle piece—well, I like it when my morbid sense of humor confuses people to the point that they don’t know whether to laugh or puke. Yeah, that sounds horrible, but there’s nothing that gets an emotional reaction out of a reader faster than giving them a horrific read, then throwing a hairpin curve in the rollercoaster I’ve created by making a joke.

What one character thrills you to your bones to take to the darkside?

Good question! It depends on which I’m writing at the moment, to be honest. I truly love Jasper when he goes all Major on everyone, but that doesn’t necessarily have to be dark. It’s fun to write, though.

Carlisle is a blast! I mean, he isn’t someone you see as dark, so once you take him to the dark side, there’s no going back. Plus, he’s so damn intelligent that it makes him slipperier than dog shit on a doorknob. He’s gonna be able to evade a lot of people for a while. *evil grin*

Decay is sooo much fun on a different level. I think it’s because this Bella is absolutely, certifiably insane. She needs to be locked up in the loony bin, which makes it so much more fun to write! There’s a TON of dark humor in there, so yeah, it’s probably my favorite right now. Of course, I just finished writing chapter two, so that might be why. No, that isn’t it. I truly think it’s my favorite because there are no boundaries in Decay. I have to rein myself in with my other fics (Unbelievable, I know! But, it’s true), but with Decay I just let my mind completely open up and let every fucked up idea make it to the page. It’s exhilarating to be able to do that!

Would you like to share anything new that you’re working on/going to post?

Sure! I’m working on a Dark Peter fic, but I will wrap up at least one or two of my other fics before even thinking about posting it. I’ve managed to stretch myself a bit too thin in real life and with my fics, so I’m waiting until I have a bit more time before I work on it seriously. The idea is floating around in my head, though. It won’t leave me alone so I play with it now and then.

OhmyEdward, she just said a dark Peter fic.

A DARK PETER FIC!!!!!

*squees*

With that little titillating temptation, we’ll wrap up this segment of Dark Delectables That Made You Say Daaaaaamn. Thanks to HammerHips for joining us, and finally joining the “cool” kids in our quest for all things dark. If you haven't read any of her stuff, go. Go NOW. Also, to our lickable and lovely review whores givemesomevamp and SushiLovesWhitlock for their scintillating scene suggestions!

If any of you pervs would like to offer up your favorite dark author, and the moment from their fic that made you say, “Where in the name of sparkly peen did you come up with that scene?” hit me with an email at foreveredwards7@gmail.com.

‘Til next time, may your Darkest Temptations be served…